success magazine
Success Tweet 135: Be a Consensus Builder
Oct 22nd
My new career success coach book Success Tweets: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice, All in 140 Characters or Less is turning out to be quite a hit. It is now in its third printing. Over 2,000 people have downloaded the free eBook version. I think it’s a great addition to my career advice writings. Go to www.SuccessTweets.com to get a .pdf of Success Tweets for free.
If you want to purchase a hard copy for yourself – or two or three to give to friends, associates, people you mentor, people you manage, your kids, your grandkids – go to Amazon.com or send me an email at Bud@BudBilanich.com. I’ll send you quantity pricing information.
Today’s career advice comes from Tweet 135…
Be a consensus builder. Focus on where you agree with others. It will be easier to resolve differences and create agreement.
The July 2009 issue of SUCCESS Magazine had an interesting interview with Patrick Lencioni, author of The Five Dysfunctions of a Team. I’m an admirer of Patrick’s writing. I particularly like what he has to say about teams and teamwork. Fear of conflict is one of the team dysfunctions he discusses in the book and interview in SUCCESS.
And, if you read this blog with any regularity, you know that I am a big fan of SUCCESS Magazine. I read it cover to cover every month and usually blog about one or two of the articles in each issue. If you’re not a subscriber, I suggest you go to www.success.com and do so now.
Here’s what Patrick Lencioni has to say about conflict and disagreement…
“The fact is that great teams argue. Not in a mean spirited or personal way. But they disagree, and passionately, when important decisions are made. They argue about concepts and ideas and avoid personality focused, mean spirited attacks. So many of us have been raised to avoid conflict and disagreement that we try to compromise and reach artificial consensus, and that only leads to mediocrity.”
Successful, interpersonally competent people are not mean spirited. They don’t attack others. They do, however, voice their disagreement with another’s ideas in a positive manner. They use conflict to find better, more creative solutions to their differences with others.
I always encourage my career success coach clients who find themselves in conflict to do something that is counter intuitive – focus on where you agree, not where you disagree. When you are in conflict with another person, it is natural to focus on your differences. However, this approach tends to lead to digging in your heels and looking for support for your position. The more you do this, the less you open you are to hearing what the other person has to say. Conflict resolution becomes a zero sum, win/lose game.
On the other hand, if you actively look for and find places where you agree, you can jointly create a solution that satisfies both of your needs. Here is an example.
When we bought our house, we had a conflict with the seller over the closing date. This was happening at the end of the year. The seller, who was also the builder, wanted to close by December 31. We were not planning on moving until February 1. Due to some ambiguous language in the contract, the situation was becoming quite contentious.
Finally, I said to the builder, “John, you want to sell this house. We want to buy it. I’m sure we can work out a closing date that suits us both.” At that point, the tone of our discussions changed. We were working together to solve a problem – not arguing over December 31 and February 1 dates. Even though we both ended up giving a little, neither of us felt that we had given up on our position. We were able to resolve our conflict positively.
The common sense career success coach point here is simple. Successful people are interpersonally competent. Interpersonally competent people resolve conflict positively, with little damage to their relationships. They follow the career advice in Tweet 135 in Success Tweets. “Be a consensus builder. Focus on where you agree with others. It will be easier to resolve differences and create agreement.” Conflict can be destructive to relationships and it can kill your career success. But when you work to resolve conflict positively, you strengthen your relationships. Strong relationships make it easier for you to resolve future conflicts and build your career success. Focusing on points of agreement, however small, is the best way to resolve conflict positively. Focusing on where you agree puts you in a position to jointly create a mutually satisfying solution to a conflict, as opposed to win/lose negotiation in which one person wins and the other loses.
That’s my take on the career advice in Tweet 135 in Success Tweets and on how to resolve conflict positively. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. Share your stories of successful and amicable conflict resolution. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
Success Tweet 115: Presenting to Win
Sep 24th
I’m in the home stretch of a series of blog posts that further explain the career advice in Success Tweets: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice, All in 140 Characters or Less, my latest career success coach book. I’m going to be sorry when this series is finished. I hope you’re enjoying reading it as much as I’m enjoying writing it.
Success Tweets is about to go into its third printing. That really pleases me. It has become a greater success than I thought it would be. You can pick up a copy at your local bookstore or at Amazon.com. Better yet, you can download it for free at www.SuccessTweets.com.
Today’s career advice comes from Success Tweet 115…
Become an excellent presenter. Careers have been made on the strength of one or two good presentations.
Darren Hardy is the Publisher of SUCCESS Magazine. I love SUCCESS. It is full of very useful and usable information every month. If you aren’t already a subscriber, go to www.success.com as soon as you finish reading this post and do so. A subscription to SUCCESS will put you on the road to the life and career success you want and deserve.
Darren also sends very informative emails to subscribers. A while back he posted a great piece covering his best tips for delivering dynamite presentations. He was gracious enough to allow me to repost it here…
Darren Hardy’s 10 Tips for More Compelling Presentations
1. Prepare. Nothing beats great preparation. I usually write out a presentation word for word, then I reduce it to a skeleton outline, then bullet points, then just key words on paper in case I need to quickly glance down at trigger words to guide me along, but I will rarely use the notes. Just going through the process is my process for learning the presentation.
2. Know your audience. Find out the demographic mix of the audience. Find out who the key players are so you can use their names during the presentation. Understand core aspects about their company, cause, products, ideals, etc. Understand the trends, competition and key issues that the audience faces. If they know you know who they are in the first few minutes, they will be your ally for the rest of the presentation.
3. Sell it. Not necessarily you or what you are promoting, sell your presentation. Open up with an attention getter. Imagine the format of an infomercial. Explain the grand benefits they are going to get by listening raptly to the information you are about to share.
4. Package it. Tell them what you are going to tell them (through benefits, outcomes, the difference this information will make in their lives), tell them (deliver the goods), then tell them what you told them (post-sell the benefits so they know you have just given them great value).
5. Be entertaining. Yes, you need to be informative and enlightening, but you are talking to humans—they are bored easily. If people are entertained, they are engaged and are more apt to actually listen to what you are saying.
6. Be visual. I think in pictures, so I talk in pictures. I use visual aids and talk in word pictures and metaphors. People seldom recall words, but they do remember pictures.
7. Tell stories. I am not a natural storyteller. I have to force myself to break off and tell a story, but the best speakers, lecturers and influencers the world has known were all great storytellers. Collect them and get good at telling them. BUT, make sure they are relevant to the point you are making. I dislike gratuitous storytelling for stories’ sake in a keynote. I can read a book or go to a movie for that. Make sure the story is on point.
8. Overdress. My grandmother taught me this. People look at you before they listen to you. How you show up communicates 80 percent of whether someone should (or will) listen to you or not. During the first 5 minutes people will assess you up and down and draw all sorts of conclusions. Make sure the conclusions they draw are: professional, polished, credible and sensible (at least). Whatever you think the dress code will be dress at least one or two steps above it. There is nothing worse than being underdressed—it’s disrespectful. You are going to be onstage; people expect that you respect that position and dress UP for it.
9. Be Yourself. Don’t try to be Zig Ziglar or Tony Robbins. Me? I don’t like beating on my chest and yelling, having the crowd jump up and down on their chairs, run around the stage or drop to my knee for dramatic effects. You will never see me do that; it’s not me. My best advice for you is to be you. Be onstage as you are offstage. Be real, authentic and communicate through your true feelings and conviction—it is from that place you can be persuasive, rousing and influencing.
10. See the ‘O.’ I always spend a few minutes before each keynote visualizing the presentation and the audience response: the rapt attention, the awe-inspired looks on their faces, their laughing and having a good time, then the rousing standing ovation at the end. It helps me get into the ‘zone’ and raise my emotional energy before getting started.
Knowing your audience is Darren’s second presentation tip. It is an important step in creating a memorable presentation that will get you noticed by the right people. I saw a Dilbert cartoon a couple of years ago that reinforces the importance of audience analysis for creating and delivering great presentations. Pay attention, the lesson to be learned here is some great career advice.
In the first panel, the boss says, “Dilbert is our next presenter.” Standing in front of a screen with a PowerPoint slide projected on it Dilbert says, “Thanks for coming to my presentation. I put in a lot of time creating it. I hope you’ll like it and find it informative. First, I’m going to run a little slide show and do a humorous rap to accompany it. Then you’ll all get a chance to participate. I’ll give you funny hats and you’ll put together some skits. And then we’ll have fireworks in the atrium of our building.”
The last panel shows the members of the audience. One of them says, “Can you cut it short, we allowed only three minutes for your talk.”
I know this sounds absurd, but one of my career success coach clients experienced an eerily similar situation. His bosses’ boss asked him to prepare a presentation on what his department does. This talk was going to be for the Executive Committee of his company – the 12 most senior people in the entire company – and this was a big company, over $20 billion in sales, so these were very important people.
He saw this as a huge opportunity – for himself and his department. The presentation was a month in the future. He spent most of that month working on the talk, developing about 70 nice looking slides with animation and a brief video. There were no funny hats and fireworks, but the presentation had a lot of very cool graphics. He practiced again and again making sure that he had it down pat. The talk lasted about 90 minutes.
The day before he was supposed to do the talk, his bosses’ boss asked him to come to his office to do a run through of the talk to make sure that things would go smoothly the next day. He, his boss and the big boss went into a conference room. He hooked up his computer to the projector and began previewing his carefully thought out talk. After about seven minutes, the big boss said, “How many more slides do you have?”
My client said, “I’m just getting started, I have about 70 slides total.”
The big boss said, “That’s way too many. They only want a 10 minute overview of what your department does. You need to revise your talk and cut down the number of slides.”
My client spent the rest of the day and most of the evening revising his talk, cutting out the graphics and animation.
When he and I next got together for a career success coach discussion, he was really frustrated. He explained the situation to me and complained about the big boss. “He never told me that all they wanted was a 10 minute overview of what we do. I wasted a lot of time putting together this presentation.”
I said, “Did you ever ask him how long the talk should be?”
He said, “No. I just assumed that the Executive Committee would want a very thorough understanding of what our department does.”
And that is the crux of the problem. My client missed a really important step in developing a powerful presentation. He did no audience analysis. He assumed his audience would be as interested in his topic as he is.
In this case, he failed to realize that the senior people in the company wanted a quick look at his department – not an in depth review of everything they do and how they do it. If he had taken the time to ask the big boss a few simple questions, he wouldn’t have wasted his time developing an in depth presentation. He didn’t really want to hear it, but this was the best career advice I could give him.
Analyzing your audience is an important first step in developing any presentation. Here are a few simple questions you should ask and answer before you begin developing any presentation…
- Who is my audience for this presentation?
- Why are they there?
- What do they want or need to get from my talk?
- How much do they know about my topic?
- Are they familiar with any jargon I might use?
- What is there general attitude towards me and the information I’ll be communicating?
These questions will help you develop and deliver the kind of presentation that will meet your audience’s needs, help you shine as a presenter and get you on the road to the life and career success you want and deserve.
The common sense career success coach point here is simple. Successful people are competent communicators. Presentation skills — along with conversation and writing skills — is one of the communication skills you have to master if you want to become a life and career success. Follow the career advice in Tweet 115 in Success Tweets. “Become an excellent presenter. Careers have been made on the strength of one or two good presentations.” Audience analysis is the first step in developing a compelling presentation. You have to understand your audience’s wants and needs before you can develop a great talk. Take a few minutes to think about your audience before you begin developing any presentation. If you do, you’ll be more likely to deliver a great talk that will get you noticed in a positive way and put you on the road to the career success you want and deserve.
That’s my take on the career advice in Success Tweet 115 and audience analysis for presentation success. What’s yours? Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
Success Tweets 39
Jun 10th
My latest career success coach book, Success Tweets: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice, All in 140 Characters or Less is now available on Amazon.com and in bookstores. I am in the process of blogging about each of the tweets in it. You can get a free copy of Success Tweets at www.SuccessTweets.com. If you like it, I’d appreciate a positive review on Amazon.com.
Today’s career success coach post is on Tweet 39…
While other people and events have an impact on our life, they don’t shape it. You get to choose how you react to people and events.
As I was getting ready to write this post, an email from my friends at Heart Math popped up in my in box. It had a quote from Viktor Frankl…
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.”
Victor Frankl survived the Nazi death camps in WWII. He lost his wife, mother and father in those camps. His experience with the Nazis led him to conclude that even in the most absurd, painful and dehumanized situation, life has potential meaning.
He chronicled his experiences in the camps and what he learned from them in his famous book, Man’s Search for Meaning. In 1991, the US Library of Congress designated it as one of the ten most influential books in the United States. It as sold over 10 million copies and been translated into 24 languages.
One of his famous quotes always brings tears to my eyes…
“We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
Speaking of attitude, the June 2010 issue of SUCCESS Magazine has a great article by John Maxwell called “Attitude Is the Difference Maker.” If you’re not already a subscirber, I suggest you go to www.success.com and become one. The career advice in SUCCESS is invaluable. WhatJohn has to say about attitude is a great example. ..
“Attitude isn’t everything, but it’s the main difference maker.”
As you can see from the Viktor Frankl quote above, choosing your attitude is choosing your own way. As a human being, you get to choose how you respond to the people and events in your life. You can choose to have a positive, optimistic attitude and respond to difficult people and events in a constructive manner. Or, you can choose to have a negative attitude and respond to difficult people and events in a self destructive manner. Your attitude is the difference maker between a successful, rewarding life and career and an unsuccessful and unfulfilling life and career.
Take it from a career success coach. You get to choose how you respond to every person you meet and everything that happens that happens to you. Your moment of choice comes in between the stimulus and your response. This can be a small space, but it is a real space that exists. Your attitude has a big impact on what you choose in these moments of choice.
Writing in SUCCESS, John Maxwell says, “Your attitude makes a difference in how you face challenges. Successful people don’t have fewer problems than unsuccessful people – they just have a different mindset.” That bares repeating – “Successful people don’t have fewer problems than unsuccessful people – they just have a different mindset.”
We all have our problems and challenges. The difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is simple. Successful people choose to respond to problems in a positive manner. They choose a positive, proactive approach. They choose to take personal responsibility for themselves, their actions and their life and career success. They choose to see problems as challenges – and they meet the challenges they encounter.
Choose is the important word here. We human beings have free will. We can choose how we respond to the things that happen to us. We can choose our attitude. Successful people choose to respond positively to the negative people and events in their lives. Successful people choose to have a positive attitude.
The SUCCESS article has a quote from Chuck Swindoll on the “Power of Attitude”…
“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than education, than money, than circumstance, than failures, than successes, then what other people think, say or do. It is more important that appearance, giftedness or scale. It will make or break a company, a church, a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we embrace for that day. We cannot change the past. We cannot change the fact that people act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90 % how I react to it; and so it is with you. We are in charge of our attitude.”
Or as Viktor Frankl says…
“Life ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answer to its problems and to fulfill the tasks which it constantly sets for each individual.”
The common sense career success coach point here is simple. Your attitude is the difference maker. A positive attitude leads to positive results and career success. A negative attitude leads to negative results. The good thing is that you can choose your attitude. Remember the career advice and wisdom in Tweet 39 in Success Tweets. “While other people and events have an impact on our life, they don’t shape it. You get to choose how you react to people and events.” Use the free will that God has given you to create your life and career success. Choose a positive attitude. Choose to respond positively to the negative people and events in your life. Remember what Viktor Frankl, a holocaust survivor teaches us, “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.” Empower yourself to make the right choices, the positive choices, when you encounter negative people and events.
That’s my take on the career advice in Tweet 39 in Success Tweets – and the advice of Viktor Frankl, John Maxwell and Chuck Swindoll. What’s yours? Please take a few minutes to leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. As always, thank for reading. I have an attitude of gratitude when it comes to my readers. I really appreciate you.
Bud


