communicaiton
Success Tweet 107: Listen More Than You Speak
Sep 14th
My latest career success coach book, Success Tweets: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice, All in 140 Characters or Less is about to go into its third printing. That really pleases me. It has become a greater success than I thought it would be. You can pick up a copy of Success Tweets at your local bookstore or at Amazon.com. Better yet, you can download it for free at www.SuccessTweets.com.
I’m in the home stretch of a series of blog posts that further explain the career advice in Success Tweets – just 34 more to go. Today’s career advice comes from Success Tweet 107…
Become an excellent conversationalist by listening more than speaking. Pay attention to what other people say; respond appropriately.
Dynamic communication is a career success competency. If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you need to develop three skills: conversation, writing and presenting. The Merriam Webster Dictionary defines the word “dynamic” as, “Marked by continuous and productive activity.” In many ways, this is a good definition for an effective conversation.
In a conversation, two types of activities occur simultaneously: speaking and listening. In good conversations, both of these are continuous and productive. In plain English, when you’re in a conversation, if you’re not speaking and providing information, you need to be listening and receiving it.
In other posts I’ve pointed out that asking good questions is an important way to become known as a great conversationalist. But to take full advantage of the questions you ask, you need to really listen to the answers and respond appropriately.
Here are my top seven tips for becoming a good listener – and conversationalist.
1. Look the other person in the eye when he or she is speaking. This demonstrates that you are engaged with him or her.
2. Listen to understand what the other person is saying – not to plan your rebuttal.
3. Listen really hard when the other person begins by saying something with which you don’t agree.
4. Know the words that trigger your emotions. Don’t get distracted by them.
5. Be patient. Some people take longer than others to make their point. Don’t interrupt.
6. Ask clarification questions when you don’t understand.
7. Repeat what you have heard the other person say – to make sure you got it right, and to show him or her that you were listening.
These seven tips are great career advice. If you use them in conversation, you will become known as a great conversationalist and a dynamic communicator.
The common sense career success coach point here is simple. Successful people are competent. Dynamic communication is an important key success competency. If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you have to become a good conversationalist. To become a good conversationalist follow the career advice in tweet 107 in Success Tweets. “Become an excellent conversationalist by listening more than speaking. Pay attention to what other people say; respond appropriately.” Learn to listen well. Listening, like a lot of career success advice, is just common sense. Show the other person you are engaged. Focus on understanding, not on rebutting points with which you don’t agree. Don’t get distracted by words that trigger your emotions. Ask clarification questions to ensure you understand what is being said. Repeat what you’ve heard. Most of all, get in the habit of listening more that speaking.
That’s my take on listening and the career advice in Success Tweet 107. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your best listening advice. As always, thanks for reading – and writing.
Bud
Success Tweet 102: We’re All In Sales
Sep 7th
I’m proud to say that my latest career success coach book, Success Tweets: 140 Bits of Common Sense Career Success Advice, All in 140 Characters or Less is about to go into its third printing. The other day, I got a big order from Toastmasters International. You can pick up a copy of Success Tweets at your local bookstore or at Amazon.com. Better yet, you can download it for free at www.SuccessTweets.com.
I’m in the home stretch of a series of blog posts that further explain the career advice in Success Tweets. Today’s career advice comes from Success Tweet 102…
We’re all in sales. You have to sell yourself every day. You need to become a dynamic communicator to sell your ideas.
In a post I did on lifelong learning in mid 2009, I stressed the idea that successful people pay attention to information that may seem as if it has little relevance to them – they know that they might learn something that will help them create the career success they deserve.
The career advice in today’s post comes from a book that you might be tempted to overlook if you’re not a sales professional – or if you haven’t read the post on lifelong learning I mentioned above.
How to Win a Pitch, a very interesting book by Joey Asher, might seem like a book meant only for sales professionals. But it’s not. Some of my best career advice is “we’re all in sales, we have to sell ourselves every day.” If you want the life and career success you deserve, you have to create positive personal impact – get people interested in you. Then you have to be a good communicators to sell your ideas.
Joey Asher presents five common sense fundamental ideas for becoming a persuasive communicator…
- Focus your message on the business problem.
- Organize your message around three memorable points.
- Show passion.
- Involve your audience in your presentation.
- Rehearse…Rehearse…And Rehearse Again.
I like Joey’s points – even if he has listed five instead of three. Just kidding. The important career advice is to focus on a minimal number of points.
Joey Asher has five fundamentals for becoming a persuasive communicator. I have four keys to career and life success: Clarity, Commitment, Confidence and Competence. The fact that my four keys begin with the letter “C” makes it even easier for people to remember them. In my case, this was a happy coincidence. I don’t suggest trying to force alliterations or acronyms. If your subject matter lends itself to them – great go with it. If not, don’t force it.
I love Joey’s career advice about passion. He is 100% correct when he says that your voice is your first key to passion. It’s OK to sound as if you’re excited – you should be excited about creating your life and career success.
I learned this the hard way. I once lost a job I really wanted because I didn’t let my passion show through in the interview. Ironically, I made a conscious decision to act in a laid back manner in the interview. You know, “We’re both professionals here. I’m calm. I know myself. I can do this job. No sense in over hyping it.”
As it turns out, I was one of two finalists for the job. The recruiter told me that the hiring manager liked my skills and experience more than the other guy, but he hired the other guy because he showed more passion and drive. I’ve never made the mistake of not letting my passion show through again.
By nature, I am a passionate guy. I care about what I do. After that hard lesson, I let this passion show through, when I’m selling and when I’m doing my work. I have found that it’s hard to care too much. And, if I’m going to fail, I’m going to fail showing how much, not how little, I care. Joey Asher and I urge you to do the same.
I also agree with Joey on the importance of rehearsals. As I often say — only half jokingly — “Preparation makes up for a lack of talent. That’s how I’ve gotten as far as I have in my life and career.” Prepare, prepare, prepare and you’ll become a better communicator, and be on your way to career success.
The common sense career success coach point here is simple. Successful people are dynamic communicators. Dynamic communicators have mastered three critical skills: conversation, writing and presenting. They follow the career advice in Tweet 102 in Success Tweets. “We’re all in sales. You have to sell yourself every day. You need to become a dynamic communicator to sell your ideas.” Dynamic communication hinges on your ability to sell yourself. Once you realize that regardless of your job title, you are a salesperson and that you need to constantly sell yourself and your ideas you’ll be ahead of the game. In How to Win a Pitch, Joey Asher suggests that successful sales people have mastered five fundamental skills: 1) Focus your message on the business problem. 2) Organize your message around three memorable points. 3) Show passion. 4) Involve your audience in your presentation. 5) Rehearse…Rehearse…And Rehearse Again. This is great career advice. Become an expert in these five fundamental skills, and you’ll be on your way to creating the life and career success you want and that you deserve.
That’s my take on the career advice in Success Tweet 102 and what Joey Asher has to say about successful selling. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
